I must first tell you that I am not good at these dates. The most important element of the date is the listening and I have to admit that it is also the hardest element. It is hard to be really interested in the daily dramas of a 7 or 5 years old girl. The problem is that they know when you aren’t listening. I also have the urge to make it a time for me to teach or tell her something and the date night is not the time for that.
Things that I do. First I let her know that it is coming, usually( explain later). I tell her that I am looking forward to our time and tell her to be sure to where nice cloths and do her hair. I call her in the middle of that afternoon and tell her I can’t wait to get off work so we can go on our date. I get home and dress nice, put on cologne (smells are the strongest memory sense), I do this so that when ever she smells cologne she will have a pleasant memory of her dad. ( to this day I remember the time with my dad from his cologne). I open the car door for her and give her the queen treatment. I ask “favorite questions” what is you favorite subject, what was the best part of you day at school today. I try to stay focused on what she likes to talk about.
Now about the dates and where and what? Well it really isn’t that important but here are some of the things we do. We go to Joe Muggs New Stand at the Summit and get a coffee and hot coaoa and look at magazines. We have gone to dinner at a restaurant and afterwards gone to the toy store. We went to the gazebo in Vestavia and looked at the view. She loves to go to the Apple store and play the games there. Gone to Pottery Barn Kids. Spontaneity is always fun too. I have put the girls to bed and waited an hour and woke them both up and in our PJ’s gone to the drive through at Dairy queen. (I do this when Stacey is out of town or out late with friends) They love it. I also will wake one of the girls up really early in the morning and go for a hike at Oak Mnt.
When I first started doing the date thing I thought about taking both girls on our date but I found that by doing them separate the girls feel more special and they learn what it is like to be treated right on a date. I want them to recognize this so when they go on dates with boys they will know what a good date is like and not to put up with the bad dates. As a son my dad taught me how to treat a women on a date by his treatment of my mom. My relationship with my earthly father profoundly effected my relationship with my heavenly Father. I still consider my dad my best friend. Raising kids it is important to keep the role of father and then the role of friend. Kids want to be told “no” it lets them know that you love them enough to do what is right not just what they want. You see kids that have never been told “no” and they are the discipline problems. Kids will always push the limits of their parents, they do this in order to know you love them enough to say “no”. The opposite of love is not hate, it is apathy. My laziness wants to let them have their way rather than say “no” and have to do some thing. I am lazy at heart and it is a fight of that nature to be a parent. I fail and fail and fail, praise God for grace and the power of grace that compels me to obedience to stop being lazy and to plan a date with daddy.
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